How do i tell my daughter shes dating the wrong guy

By Kristin Crosby Monday, October 31, So gauging exactly who your kids might be dating and whether those relationships are happy and healthy can be tricky to navigate. But social media aside, for young people in brand-new relationships, there are almost immediate changes to detect: But after a few weeks, as the early motions of a relationship settle in, there may be some clear signs that will help parents see whether their daughters, in particular, are in healthy dating relationships or not.

How Do I Disapprove of My Daughter's Friend or Boyfriend Without Being an Invasive Mom?

Here are a few red flags that, when waved high enough, are indications a young woman may not be in the right relationship over the long haul:. DeLoach, a mental health counselor based in Lakeland, Florida. This may be the most obvious and painful sign for parents to observe. Many young women become more self-aware when a man is suddenly in the picture.

Your Daughter's Dating the Wrong Guy | LifeZette

But when the young woman is constantly second-guessing herself, concerned with meeting his expectations and never feels like she amounts to enough in order to please him — something is wrong. When a relationship is healthy, petty worries and comparisons should diminish into thin air. He never pays for dinner.

Many a young woman has experienced the end of a night out when, out of the blue, the guy expects her to pay for her own meals.

How To Choose A Partner Wisely

When watching a TV show, for example, you can say something along the lines of, "Yes that boy has really changed over the past year. He's probably just searching for his identity.

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That's normal for teenagers, but if he can't treat his girlfriend with respect during this time, she's better off without him. Ask open-ended questions that initiate further discussion, rather than close-ended questions that require only "yes" or "no" answers.

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Examples include, "What do you think about how your friend Dylan treats his girlfriend? Get to know your daughter's friends. Teenagers rely on their friends for guidance and support. Showing an interest in your daughter's friends serves a dual purpose: Speak sooner rather than later.

Important signs parents can't ignore

It's easier for your daughter to listen to your advice to end a bad relationship before she's spent a lot of time with the wrong boy. Use specific facts, such as "a boy who was aggressive with his old girlfriend is more likely to be aggressive with you.


Discuss clear dating rules with your daughter including areas such as curfew, appropriate age of dating partners, no violence, no disrespectful language, no use of alcohol or drugs. If your daughter's boyfriend breaks the rules, you have an objective, unarguable reason to prohibit her dating him anymore.

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Set and enforce the same set of rules for both your daughter and your son. Being consistent helps you gain respect and integrity in your daughter's eyes and makes it more likely that she'll listen to your advice about her dating choices. Establish a clear protocol for how to disagree. While both you and your daughter have a right to express their opinions, you are the parent and should maintain parental control by consistently enforcing reasonable parental rules, even though your daughter might disagree. Brenda Scottsdale is a licensed psychologist, a six sigma master black belt and a certified aerobics instructor.

She has been writing professionally for more than 15 years in scientific journals, including the "Journal of Criminal Justice and Behavior" and various websites. The wrong guy speaks disrespectfully to your daughter. References Centers for Disease Control and Prevention: